Grotesque Anatomy
Tuesday, December 16, 2003
  "I Am Reborn, Like A Cheap Plastic Action Figure."
Disturbing Trend:  Toy lines devoted to specific storylines.

Not content with making action figures based on each and every character they publish, DC is now putting out action figures based on each and every slight variation of every character they publish.  First it was the Kingdom Come action figures, now it's THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS ACTION FIGURES:
Frank Miller’s seminal work on the gritty, ground-breaking DARK KNIGHT RETURNS changed the landscape of comics forever and inspired a new generation of comics creators. Now, DC Direct celebrates that immortal series with a quartet of figures beautifully sculpted by Tim Bruckner that capture the look and feel of Miller’s Batman, Superman, The Joker, and Robin!
  • THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS: BATMAN ACTION FIGURE measures approximately 7 3/8” tall, features multiple points of articulation and comes with a Batarang with rope. This figure also includes a sidewalk base and comes packaged in a 4-color window box.
  • THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS: ROBIN ACTION FIGURE, which portrays Carrie Kelly as the Dark Knight’s apprentice, measures approximately 4 7/8” tall, features multiple points of articulation and comes with a slingshot and rope. This figure also includes a sidewalk base with street lamp featuring a glow-in-the-dark street lamp and comes packaged in a 4-color window box.
  • THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS: THE JOKER ACTION FIGURE measures approximately 6 5/8” tall, features multiple points of articulation and comes with a two pistols and a Joker doll. This figure also includes a sidewalk base and comes packaged in a 4-color window box.
  • THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS: SUPERMAN ACTION FIGURE measures approximately 7 3/8” tall, features multiple points of articulation and comes with alternate hands holding a crushed Bat-armor helmet and a Kryptonite arrow. This figure also includes a sidewalk base and comes packaged in a 4-color window box.
This project is supported with trade and house ads and a full-color promo poster.

What do these toys do?  I imagine the Batman figure complaining about being too old.  And why is there no Mutant Leader figure, with Mud Pit / Operating Table Battleground Arena (sold separately)?  I really want some Mutant Gang figures that say the classic lines "BALLS nasty" and "Leader don't shiv."  Now there's a toy I might seriously consider buying.

 
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Iron Fist

by John Jakala

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